Softening in your feminine essence through heart-led forgiveness
Softening in your feminine essence through heart-led forgiveness, an article for the woman who is desiring to release her past and restore the radiance of her being.
in my feminine softening work, i have noticed that when a woman starts returning home to her feminine essence, she experiences two kinds of emotions she is not expecting to find on this journey.
a deep grief for what was lost, for the time that got wasted, for a live unlived, for desires that were suppressed.
and, a burning rage for the wrongs she allowed to happen to her, for the ways she abandoned herself in the pursuit of love, belonging and connection with others.
she also knows that for her to keep moving on this journey of homecoming, she must feel these emotions, receive the medicine they carry within, gather the lessons they are teaching her, and use them to create an even more beautiful life for herself.
this begins with her practicing the art of forgiveness radially and wholly. forgiving without the former scorekeeping, forgiving despite the former resentment, forgiving even if there was a lot of hurt involved.
but this doesn’t always feel as easy as one can think of it to be. living in a heart-hardening highly-masculinised world, so many of us women lose touch with our softness, with the essence of our feminine energy souls.
hardening feels easier, holding resentment feels easier.
this way of living feeds the ego, it is designed to work that way now. because any piece of history will tell us that when the world wasn’t so deeply masculinised, we thrived on connection and love and belongingness. we were open and willing to understand others’ perspectives and forgive them for their shortcomings.
today, that’s different..disconnection is the norm, empathy and understanding aren’t as valued. it feels easier to hold a grudge than to simply let go by forgiving and releasing ourselves from the life-reducing tendrils of the past.
and yet, we know that this is not the way we want to live, grow and shine our radiance in the world as women. we don’t thrive under this weight of resentment. it instantly reflects in the beauty of our souls, in the texture of our skin, in the glow of our faces, in the inner harmony of our heart.
it takes a rather radical inner shift to be able to see that forgiving and releasing ourselves from our past doesn’t signify weakness. instead, it is a deeper decision that’s rooted in our softer power as women. one that doesn’t let us shatter but instead helps us feel the pain of a heartbreak and alchemise that ache into something even more beautiful. a quality of our quiet feminine power may not be as celebrated, but is still a treasure that lies deep beneath our hard masculine shields.
because if there’s one thing i have felt in my own experience and in coaching women with their feminine softening and embodiment, is that once we have released an undesirable part of our past from our beings, it frees up so much of our life force that was trapped under this huge plateau of resentment, regret, remorse, anger and more denser emotions.
it helps our inner world regain its natural, pristine state that had taken a different shape with these emotions stored in our body. it helps us regain the emotional safety we felt within us before unpleasant things happened to us.
the deeper we can allow ourselves to soften into the ache of these darker emotions that we have been avoiding, the easier it becomes to reach that point within us where there is nothing else left but to forgive.
at this juncture, it is no more about the other person or our selves. it is simply a release, a liberation from what’s holding us back from living our most radiant life.
freeing ourselves from these traces of our past clears up our energetic aura creating a fresh new space in our lives for newer possibilities, relationships, and experiences to be allowed in our life. it makes us feel lighter, happier, more connected with our natural feminine Eros as sensitive-hearted women.
we start feeling more open to exchanges of love, to support, to compassion and kindness. we regain our inherent sense of playfulness and pleasure towards experiencing the bountiful richness of our lives.
we are able to open our heart to new possibilities and live out our most fulfilled version of life. and why else are we here on earth if not to create our own heaven of peace and happiness?
we are meant to flow through life, not restrict ourselves with the burden of undesirable experiences. not hold grudges for what didn’t serve us or affected us adversely in our past.
we are deserving of moving through life with ease, savoring each moment as it comes.
i can share an experience from my own journey of feminine softening and embodiment that when i started realising how much of myself had i lost to the hyper-masculine conditioning that was instilled in me starting from my teenage years, i felt so angry at everything and everyone around me.
there was also a deeper sense of grief that i felt for the years i had lost, for the ways i abandoned myself to meet the ideals of success and prosperity that my social culture had instilled in me very early on in life. for the ways i felt disrespected by a work culture that was not designed to support my growth as a sensitive-hearted woman and so i had to place shields after shields on my heart to toughen up and get going, climbing up the corporate ladder of success that on most days felt meaningless to me.
after going through quite a few rounds of this anger, resentment, grief and remorse, i found how exhausted i felt from this relentless spiralling. and as is the natural progression in the process of feminine healing, i reached a place within me where there was nothing else left but to forgive and release all the people, situations, experiences that had caused me harm, in one way or the other.
as i allowed myself to enter into this space of heart-led forgiveness, i noticed how much softer i felt in my being. this softening further gave me the strength to keep an open heart as i moved through life and showed me how to live a little more lightly, forgiving a little more sooner anytime i experienced hurt from there on.
and as for the highly-masculinised nature of the world we live in, i decided that the only way i could change it is by deepening even more tenderly in my own feminine embodiment.
this looked like allowing myself to fully embrace my softness, in my own life and in my relationships.
speaking my truth with courage even when i was the one who messed up.
not feeling scared to open my heart to love even after the hardest of the heartbreaks.
creating structures of business and success that honored my sensitive-hearted nature.
moving through life at my own pace, still believing that all that my heart desires is possible for me, even if it takes a little longer in this fast-paced illusion of time and space.
and so, if you’re at a point in your life where you’re hurting, where you’re feeling disheartened and weighed down by the seemingly assaulting experiences of life, please know that there is a beautiful life that awaits you beyond this ache and grief.
where you will smile again, where your heart will feel happy again.
and for that, you must liberate all that’s feeling heavy on your heart.
you must be patient with yourself and let your body process and release these emotions.
you must trust that you are still allowed to hope for a life that your heart still holds the desire for.
after all, that is the path of feminine healing, a path that asks you to soften and keep your heart open so you can allow love, ease, possibility, fulfilment and radiance both in your inward and outward life.
when you want to journey deeper
if you need more support on this path, i offer some meditations in my Feminine Healing collection around this. more specifically have a look at the Liberate & Flow practice.
inspired from some of these personal experiences, i’ve also created an email course titled Her Soft Power to support women who want to soften out of their hyper-masculine conditioning, reclaim the quiet strength of their feminine gifts and live a life overflowing with peace, beauty, ease, joy and pleasure. if you’re at a point on your journey of feminine softening where you’re seeking healing through reading, reflection and journaling, here’s where you can learn more about this offering.
whatever you decide to receive support from, i hope it helps you soften a little more deeply and forgive a little more easily.
Navdeep 💗
p.s. looking for more articles on feminine softening in life and in love? please visit here.
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