How to connect with your magnetic sensuality, an article for the woman who wants to invite more pleasure and expansiveness in her life.
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One of the most profound gifts I have given myself in this life is learning the skills to connect with my magnetic sensuality.
As a female born in a traditional Indian family, I grew up seeing the idea of a woman’s sensuality being perceived as dirty and disgraceful. Something that’s supposed to be explored within the four walls of a house. Something that’s reserved for moments of intimacy with your partner. (Evidently, the concept of which was also often confused with a woman’s sexuality!
It wasn’t until my late twenties when I learnt that our sexuality is not equivalent to our sensuality but a beautiful subset of it.
Wherein our sensuality is our capacity to discover + connect with the aliveness, vitality and pleasure that’s pulsating through our body (literally, all the time) by using our five external and infinite internal senses.
This capacity can be cultivated by developing sensitivity to all the dimensions of our body- the physical, the emotional, the mental, and the energetic. By noticing the pulse, the texture, the feel of these sensations, we are able to..
- create a toolkit of our internal senses to discover pleasure in our body,
- witness aliveness in the form of feel good sensations in our body,
- use this vitality as an emotional & energetic fuel for our day to day life interactions with the wider world.
Since this work is inside out, this enhanced sensitivity to our inner world leads to us being able to experience pleasure and aliveness using our external senses even more easily.
And what does that result in?
A sensually alive, an emotionally charged YOU who is not only magnetic to the humans around her but also to the invisible and endless possibilities her life holds for her. As a result of which, you
- are able to experience life fully, intensely, wholly.
- derive pleasure in breathing, moving, talking, eating, drinking a plain glass of water.
- feel incredibly softer in your energy to the men/ people around you.
- feel inspired to carry out even the most routine tasks with joy and passion.
- are able to call in your heart’s deepest desires effortlessly.
- develop a slowed down, calmer rhythm in the way you experience life, in the way you interact with the world.
- And of course, feel more sensually alive in moments of physical intimacy.
Want to learn the secrets that make a woman magnetic? Download your free copy of the Magnetic Woman guide here.
4 ways to connect with your sensuality
So how do we connect with this innate, inherent, magnetic sensuality of ours? In my lived experience I have discovered these 4 beautiful ways you can start reconnecting with your sensuality and aliveness in your day to day life:
One. Softening into your body in high pressure situations.
We are currently living in a hyper-masculine, burnout-oriented world that has conditioned us to strive harder when we are in the face of a challenge.
This effort-filled way of living is so celebrated in most cultures around the globe that it ends up disconnecting us women from our innate (feminine) magnetism.
When we are in the face of a challenge, if we choose to move forward thrusting our energy to resolve that issue without first connecting with our inner flow, we are not only setting ourselves up for failure but also further hardening our inner constrictions that have arisen in response to that challenge.
What if instead of hardening up or choosing the outdated striving route, you allowed yourself to soften, you allowed your tenderness to guide you out of that situation?
The next time you find yourself in a high pressure situation, consider consciously softening into your body, connecting with your senses and moving your body to find a thread of pleasure within.
As you keep moving your body to your inherent pleasure, you’ll notice how it helps you unravel your inner frozen tension as well thus allowing you to source your fuel of right thoughts and the right innovation from within.
This happens because the more we’re connected with our inner senses, the easier it becomes for us to use our intuitive guidance to navigate that challenge far more efficiently.
Two. Slowing down and taking pleasure in everything you do.
When taking actions of eating, drinking, walking, speaking, or working, I invite you to consciously slow down and practise moment to moment awareness when you’re indulging in any activity.
You don’t need to worry about getting it perfect, just try slowing down your usual pace of doing things and then slow down a little more.
As someone whose entire journey of feminine embodiment started when she was forced to physically slow down after an unexpected surgery, I can’t emphasise enough on the importance of a slowed down rhythm for re-establishing your sensual connection.
What’s important to remember here is that this rhythm looks different for different women, there is no one-size-fits-all formula here.
So this is what happens when we start slowing down at any level of our body (physical, mental, emotional or energetic).
We start acquainting ourselves with our body’s sensations that had earlier been numbed or repressed by the fast-paced rhythm of doing life. Once this connection has been activated, we are more connected with all of our outer (five) senses and our inner felt senses.
It becomes easier for us to tap into our pleasure without relying on any external sources (casual sex, Netflix & chill, junk food, scrolling, gossip, etc) to bring that pleasure to us.
Living in connection with our self-sourced aliveness and pleasure becomes our second nature.
This sensitivity to our inner senses helps us live more richly because now we know how to feel not just our pleasure but also the other half of our emotional spectrum of uncomfortable emotions like pain, grief, anger and inner deaths & rebirths.
This is the part where we start navigating the deeper end of our feminine embodiment, where we learn how to honour the full sacred spectrum of our emotions- the pain and the pleasure, the light and the dark shadows.
(I share extensively about this in my core feminine embodiment course Your Magnetic Femininity. that’s designed to help you reconnect with the full spectrum of your feminine, feeling, sensing nature. )
Three. Bringing your awareness to connect with a thread of pleasure in your body whenever you are navigating pain.
As we covered in the previous point, once you have slowed down your usual pace of living and doing life, it becomes easier for you to observe and identify your inner felt senses. You now know how to tap into your pleasure just like how you always knew how to feel your pain.
This might come across as new information for some of us who are generally used to numbing our emotions and feelings. Where our default (and subconscious) response to pain might be to numb it out with pseudo-pleasures and so feeling the pain might not be the usual course of action for us. (this was me a few years ago.)
But the beauty of living life at a slowed down rhythm is that it helps us see even our pain as a sensation that’s temporary like every other sensation.
Every painful sensation in our body (at the physical, mental, emotional or energetic) brings to us a medicine, a message, a lesson that we need to learn in order to move into the next chapter of our lives.
When we have developed this understanding of our pain, we don’t hold it as our eternal state and can allow our connection with our pleasure to make this process of navigating our pain much, much easier.
Imagine being able to turn within and soak yourself in the threads of pleasure in your body when you are in the midst of pain. Imagine how little or no impact it has then on the outer expression of your sensuality.
You live your life as the sensually magnetic woman you were born as, both in your outlook and in your inner world, where you have now developed the lived wisdom to not let your pain reduce you to anything lesser.
Four. And finally, devoting just a few mins to your sensual flow practice everyday.
All of the above mentioned ways become easier to explore when we have learnt the skill of connecting with our inner threads of pleasure.
That’s why, it is so important to have a pleasure or sensuality practice that takes you deeper than flower baths, massages and other external self-care practices.
The ability to tune into our sensuality and pleasure is a skill that, unfortunately, we weren’t taught in our school or university curriculum. With consistent practice, it becomes our second nature to stay tuned into our pleasure regardless of where we are and what we are doing.
In my lived experience, this skill is one of the most powerful elements of our feminine embodiment because we no more need to depend even on the more popular sexual sources of pleasure to experience our true sensual power.
Imagine yourself standing in a long queue of frustrated travellers at the airport and knowing how to connect with your feel-good feelings, your pure unadulterated pleasure from within. It turns that general ordeal-filled moment of waiting into something so luscious, so expansive.
Imagine being on a date with a man and not relying on him to please you. Imagine knowing how to enjoy yourself fully, how to source your joy from within. What strong forces of romantic polarity does that create in your dating dynamic.
As you traverse deeper on this journey of your sensual embodiment, you’ll notice that not only does this inner sensual connection offer you the gift of a truly nourished and fulfilled life but also does it deepen your magnetism towards your heart-felt desires as well as the wider world around you.
journey deeper
If you are desiring to learn how to connect with your feminine essence of aliveness, pleasure and vitality through a simple (and proven) step-by-step process, I invite you to explore Rise with the Feminine, my 7-step feminine energy activation program.
In modules 5 & 6 of this powerful offering, I show you how you can activate your feminine power by somatically connecting with your sensuality and healing your relationship with your sacred sexuality.
Here’s where you can learn more about this powerful program.
related reading
When we are in the process of calling in our desires, the only way to tell if we’re embodying our feminine magnetism is to explore if we are enjoying that process and having fun on the way. Our pleasure is the only yardstick we need to determine how magnetic we are being in the manifestation of any desire of our heart. Doesn’t mater how big, how impossible, how wildly daring that desire may be. Read this article to learn how to embody your pleasure-oriented feminine energy.